Maybe
by SomewhereBeyondReality
Summary: Maybe one day he would be alright again...   Ralph returns to England to discover that maybe all is not lost and there are some who can understand. Oneshot.


**Okay; I wrote this Lord-of-the-Flies-connected story for English class so I figured; why not post it? **

**No doubt everyone has published their own versions of what happened after the boys were rescued, so this is my epilogue; answering the question of how Ralph dealt with return to civilization and that's what this fic is focused on. His relationship with his father seemed significant to the character so I've tried to build on that a little and develop that unknown figure. **

Ralph took one long shuddering breath of bitter wind blowing across white tipped waves; arching his back as it spread through him, turning his blood to ice. Squinting he raised one hand to shade his brow, sharp eyes picking up a faint outline on the horizon.

Almost unnoticeably his lips shifted, one whispering word sweeping across the deck, almost lost in the cawing of the gulls above and the splashing of the waves.

"_Home."_

Home.

England.

Civilization.

That distant memory that had clung to the tendrils of his mind in those long months trapped in a paradise turned to hell.

The corner of his mouth pulled up in a bitter smile. Well it was over now – or at least that was what everyone tried to keep telling him.

"_Yeh safe now lad." _

"_Now just calm-a-down boy, yeh dinna need teh worry about a thing." _

But they didn't understand. How could they? They were clueless oafs who had no concept of what he'd gone through on that island and never would.

Ralph gave an indignant yell, knuckles tightening around the railing. Gripping it in an iron vice. He whirled around and slammed his fist into a cabin wall. Pummelling it over and over. Burning pain shoot up his arm. Numbing it to the elbow.

At last he stopped, panting furiously.

Sweat running into his eyes. He swiped his arm across his face, gave a groan and sank to the ground. Back pressed up against the wall. Knees drawn up to his chest.

Civilization: How could he go back now? How could he risk all of those blissfully ignorant people being infected by the beast?

By him?

How was he meant to go to school and attend church after living like a savage?

If he couldn't control himself now, what would it be like later?

"I know." A voice said.

"Really scary sometimes."

Ralph's eyes snapped open. In an instant he was on his feet. Fists clenched. Eyes blazing.

"Go away!" It came out a growl. Well, maybe he should sound like the animal he was.

Jack didn't budge.

"I was chief you know." He said casually, "it was never you – not really."

Ralph gaped, all breath knocked out of him. He was _still _hankering on about his lost chief hood? Didn't he realise it was hardly something to be talked about?

Let alone boasted of.

"Yeah – chief of savages." He said fiercely. "Chief of murderers."

Jack didn't blink.

"You was a murder too."

Ralph flinched, Simon's grotesque face appearing before him eyes.

Shame spread through him. He summoned on a flash of anger to replace it.

"Just go away Jack!" His breath came out a scream."Go back to your stupid island and your hunters and leave me _alone!" _

"You're scared Ralph." The other boy gave a shrug.

"You try 'an hide it by you're even more scared than the rest of 'em."

Ralph's throat slammed shut, choking on words that couldn't reach his mouth.

He stared at Jack: for the first time in weeks he was wore proper clothes, the real sort and his face was clean. You could tell which marks on his face were freckles rather than dirt of blood. Even his hair had been trimmed, an orange mop rather than the mane of a hungry lion.

Yet despite all of this there was still something wrong.

His face was gaunt, haunted and his cheekbones far too prominent.

Most distinct of all though were his eyes; roaming in his thin face, still effulged by that madness that no amount of cleaning would scrub away.

Ralph cringed and tried to turn away, unable to expose his back to this – this thing.

"Go away Jack." He repeated wearily. "There isn't no point to this anymore."

Silence hung between them.

"You're batty." Jack snapped at last.

"P'raps that why we hunted you instead of all them others." He scowled, "there's something wrong with you Ralph, and you'll never be right again."

The deck shook as his feet slammed against the wood, his figure soon becoming no more than a distant silhouette.

XXX

The ship docks finally docks at the port, the sky is grey and overcast, the air cold.

Ralph is shivering, this is as far from the suffocating climate of the island you can get.

He keeps his head down, hesitant gaps of amazement escaping the cluster of boys trotting down the gangplank staring around at the world they had forgotten; awestruck.

"_Wizard –" _

"_Look..." _

"_Wacco!"_

Samneric let out yelps as a bus speeds past them, reaching out to link hands in unison.

"Did you see –?"

"Could've knocked us flat –"

Ralph hears frantic cries drifting towards them, his blank mind barely absorbing the plaintive sounds. He is not present in this moment.

Suddenly there are parents surrounding them, gripping their children in desperate graphs.

Some of the boys wriggle away but most of the little un's fold and press up close.

His nails dig into his palm, lips pressed together until he catches sight of a fair-haired woman running towards him, her blue eyes shining.

"Ralph!" She screams, her voice breaking, "Ralph!"

She stretches to put her arms around him and he flinches away; cowering.

Hurt floods her face.

"Ralph?" She is hesitant now, "darling...are you – are you, all right?"

Disbelief enveloped Ralph. Had she always been this stupid? Of course he wasn't 'all right'.

She was just like all the other grown ups. The grown ups who somehow managed to control the world without it turning on them like a wild dog. The grown ups who would never understand.

Then his daddy appears; strapping and handsome.

As handsome as he'd been when Ralph cared about how he looked. When he could boast to the other boy what a brave father he had.

However there was something different now. More lines creasing his face. More grey hairs consuming his smooth mop.

His eyes though, they were the same. Wise eyes. Strong eyes. Eyes that told you that everything would be fine.

Eyes that could make you believe that.

"Mary." He says softly, touching her shoulder as she begins to sob uncontrollably. "Please; stop. This isn't going to help Ralph."

He squeezed her hand, as she groped for her handkerchief.

"Of course he isn't all right." He paced slowly towards him, echoing the words that were in Ralph's mind moments before.

"He's been through something terrible...something we could never comprehend."

He bends down, his face level with Ralph's. "But...I think... that one day – with time – he will be all right again. One day."

He holds out his arms and at last Ralph falls into them.

Face buried in his chest. His daddy kisses his head, holding him close as he begins to shake.

Maybe there were grown ups who could understand. Maybe his daddy was one of them.

Maybe despite the darkness lurking in his heart, despite the destruction of his innocence, maybe what his daddy said was true.

Maybe one day he would be all right again.


End file.
